New contact and an old friend

10/20/09

At 5:45 this morning the bells of St. George went off like usual. I’ve started to sleep through it most of the time but last night it woke me. I hadn’t gone to sleep easily and slept pretty light the whole night. When they rang at quarter to six, I checked the time on my phone and when the light from the screen faded I realized something was different. It was pitch dark in the room. The kind of dark where you can’t see your hand in front of your face. Usually the streetlights from the square are strong enough that the room never achieves total darkness. I used the phone as a flashlight and walked to the balcony. Looking out I realized that none of the electricity was working in the square, with the only light coming from some candles that the owner of Grapes Wine Bar put out on their own balcony. Looking up you could see the stars – something you would never be able to see in a city like Victoria and I realized the whole city might be without power. Sure enough, once I made this realization it occurred to me that there was no “electrical buzz” of the refrigerator, and the power light for the water heater wasn’t on. This caused me to lay awake for another half hour, worrying about when the power would come back, and if I could flush the toilet or not.

I continued to sleep terribly, owing largely to the worry. Eventually the worry gave way to more light sleep and instead I was treated to being woken by the noise of Ted going up and down the stairs to check the electricity once it DID come back on. Then I was serenaded by the sound of 2 new tenants going up and down the stairs outside my door with their bags, switching the hall lights on and off and talking as they went. I had some bad dreams as well, one that involved a murder of a young girl who wasn’t discovered right away because a favorite doll was mistaken as being the girl. I remember the doll was named “Becky Damnear” because the mom thought the doll looked “damn near” like her daughter. Bizarre.

In any case, I ran into Ted in the morning at the Duke and inquired about the new British tenants. He said there weren’t any new tenants and the fellow who is renting upstairs now is a Maltese man. Uh oh. I think I inadvertently busted this guy’s sub-lease scheme. Whoops. He said he’d have to “check into it” later.

I finally bumped into Joe, the owner of the Liquer Shop below me. Well when I say “bumped” what I really mean is that he almost ran me over with the shop van. So I popped over and said “Hey! You almost ran me over!” At first he just looked at me like “I know her…I know her…I know her…” so I said “I’m Jessica, that crazy girl that was bothering you last summer…” and before I could finish the sentence he said “for the funerals!” We shook hands and he said he looked forward to seeing me around.

This afternoon I met the woman who owns “Cherished Memories” gift shop in the square. Her name is Maria (though not to be confused with the Maria I met yesterday) and we talked for about 2 hours. She owns 3 shops, including the Gozo Lace store at the Citadel (I guess that will only mean something to Wim.) She comes from a family of 9 siblings and has 3 children of her own. Next month she and her husband will celebrate their 28th anniversary together. She was able to explain a few of the bells to me. At 5pm the bells ring to let people know that the evening masses are starting. At 6pm the bells ring to let people know it’s supper time – an old custom from when everyone was in the fields and didn’t have watches. At 6:30 there is a special bell that rings that’s supposed to indicate a time everyone should pray for a blessing from God. At 8pm the bells ring as a last reminder for prayer before bed time. Clearly a lingering old tradition since most families around here don’t even eat dinner until 8 or 9 at night. Interesting. She also confirmed that she’d heard the weather was supposed to get warmer again – a sort of “Indian Summer” here, though they call it a “St. Martin’s Summer.” She said she too heard it’s going to get back up to 80. Whoo hoo! Far more exciting news was that she invited me to go for a drink sometime! Double whoo hoo! Maria and I exchanged cards and she was sure to give me her cell number, explaining that she normally doesn’t work in the shop, but pays a “shopgirl” to do it instead so I can’t always find her there. But she said I could come to the shop and leave her messages if I wanted to and she said if there’s anything I need while I’m here she’d be more than happy to help. Are we starting to see a trend here?

The funniest part about talking with her was that in the course of conversation, Sonja, the really nice waitress from Coffee Break, came in with her 16 year old daughter. She spoke with Maria in Maltese for a minute and then introduced herself to me and asked how Maria and I knew each other, convinced we must be friends because we’d been talking so comfortably. Maria explained that we’d just met and I confessed to Sonja that I actually recognized her from Coffee Break and told her that I’d met her last year. Maria and I had JUST been talking about how everyone knows everyone in Gozo so this got a great laugh from her. When I explained to Sonja the circumstances of how we met last summer, she gave me this look of recognition and then put up a finger like “wait a moment.” She then exited the store and came back in as if she were starting the whole encounter over again. She said hello to Maria and then looked at me like she was surprised to see me. She opened her arms wide and said, “Jessica! So nice to see you again my old friend! How have you been this past year?” She then hugged me, embracing me tightly twice. I played along and said how great it was to see her again too and she hugged me a third time! Maria could hardly stand for laughing and I think Sonja’s daughter probably thought we were all nuts. (But then again she’s 16 – I’m sure I recall thinking anyone over the age of 30 was nuts when I was her age.)

I’m starting to understand why so many expats decide to retire here. It’s a very friendly community. In fact, she said something about that too – about how some expats come here when they are over 60 and stay for maybe 5 years and then think, “maybe I should go home. Otherwise what will happen to me if I die? There will be no one to take care of me.” Maria told one woman that’s a ridiculous thought. She said, “you live here five years. If you don’t go see your neighbor or your neighbor don’t see you for maybe 2 days, don’t you think your neighbor would check?” She said everyone looks out for everyone else here, even if you’re not family. And everyone deserves to be buried right so they would “make best” they could. I’ve come across this several times, in interviews with various people ranging from the undertakers to the general public – people talk about “making best” and giving it your all. They talk about sympathy, courage, worth and “deserving” and say that everyone here deserves a funeral – and not just a low rate funeral but something you can consider the “best” you could do for them.

In Maria’s conversation this fit in nicely with the concepts of family and support she was discussing and how this is why you won’t see poverty in Malta, because everyone takes care of each other. She also talked about how parliament doesn’t allow divorce here, and that if they did it would ruin the fabric of the community because so much of it rests on the family structure and how different it works in Gozo versus Malta. This was the second time I’d heard that argument about divorce as well – the first in conversation with Lino and Alfred. Lino agrees with Maria though Alfred, being a family lawyer and divorced himself, disagrees. (He got divorced in Michigan where his ex-wife lives.) One funny comment she made reminded me of the scene in “My Big Fat Greek Wedding” when the mom says “the man may be the head of the house, but the woman, she is the neck. And she can turn the head anyway she wants.” Maria was talking about women who are in, what they would consider, bad marriages. She said “so your husband says he won’t give you money? Pfft. Then don’t make him dinner. I told my husband that if he ever did something like that to me, only gave me a 10 or 20 lb note and told me to make it last for a week, I would take that money and flush it down the toilet. Now there’s none for you and none for me.” Ah – the secrets to 28 years of married bliss!

When I headed back to the apartment tonight I ended up running into the British couple as they were coming out. Philip and Wendy. Sure enough – they said they are in town for a couple of days and renting the place from someone who has a longer let and is letting them stay there. They said they just met Ted and that he was very nice. I wondered if he was fuming pissed at the guy for sub-leasing the place or if he lets it slide because the guy is a guy. I vaguely remember hearing that the guy has it leased until January. I’ll have to keep tabs on what sorts come and go. Not because I want to rat this guy out to Ted, but more for my own intrigue. Especially if Ted was so down on that woman who supposedly brought back men from Sicily all the time. What’s worse? A woman who brings home random guys but pays her rent and takes care of the place OR an absentee renter who is subleasing the apartment to tourists right under your nose? I ask you. Well – I’m not really asking. I know the answer.

Ted’s coming at 10am to clean the apartment tomorrow – another fortnight has passed! Crazy.